Some choices are easy to make

What should I wear? What book should I read?

Do I want fries with that?

 

Some aren’t so easy…

Which college do I want to go to? What do I want to be?

Are you the one I want to spend the rest of my life with?

 

And sometimes, it’s by default

By deciding not to choose, you have chosen.

 

But what happens when one of those important choices comes up

and you find it’s already been made for you by someone else

without your knowledge?

 

I got angry.

The hate I thought I banished came back

The forgiveness I had given, I took back

 

I became so jealous

Of everyone I knew who had what I wanted so desperately.

It threatened to destroy a lot of relationships

I had worked so hard to build or rebuild.

 

I spent a lot of sleepless nights trying to figure out why

Why, after everything else I had gone through,

was this taken from me?

 

I still don’t have the answer to that

But I know what I do have now

I still have my family and friends

Because I threw the jealousy and hate away again

 

I still have a great life in spite of all I had to survive

 

I may not have the children I always wanted

But I am a great Aunt

And I love my nieces and nephews

I live and breathe for them

I would gladly for die for them

 

So, you took away my right to choose

Do I have kids or not?

But you didn’t really take away my right to choose

 

I may not have given birth to them

But I do have my kids

And I wouldn’t change any of this for the world!

copyright 2008 Michelle D. Wampole